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June 12, 2009



The first few years of my homeschooling experience were a disaster. I started in 7th grade… It was my choice, not much of my parents, but they were happy with it! We used books from the Islamic school I used to go to. And well, I never went out. It was lonely and depressing, being so alone. I was never the outgoing type anyway. That was my sister. I was quiet and shy… and didn’t know how to communicate with anymore. I mean, seriously, I barely said salam to anyone even before I started homeschooling. In school, I never had friends, never asked the teacher for help, never went to any ones house… never did anything.

But I never thought homeschooling limited me. There are a lot of factors that changed my social habits, but this post isn’t about my personal encounters. Oh and don’t worry, I’m not “unsocial” or as shy and afraid as I used to be :D.

The main concern of parents when they hear about home schooling is the issue of socializing. They think a class room setting helps the child’s social ability to grow. Weird how my parents never thought of how we’d socialize in the beginning years of our homeschooling… It’s one of the most ignorant comments I hear about homeschooling. “It limits socialization.”

Well, I ask you, what kind of socialization does your child get in school? Who does he interact with all day? Kids his age… then he comes home… does his homework, watches some TV, plays games, and that’s the end of it. That’s peer-based socialization. Your social abilities are not going to expand by any means when you’re with kids the same age as you, who play the same games as you, who are JUST like you…

How will your kid learn how to deal with his parents, his siblings, his aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins, the aunties :), little kids, people who are not like him??

School is SO not the real world. School is where all the kids talk about games and songs and celebrities and the latest style and which shop is hot and which is not. Trust me, I’ve seen it! That too, in Islamic schools. I can’t imagine how much worse public schools may be. You don’t even know who your child is “socializing” with at school unless you’re totally involved, which most parents aren’t. Or if you know the entire community.

On the other hand, home schooling encourages community+peer-based socialization. Being around your family more, you REALLY learn to deal with your family members. My sister and I never had a good relationship. I mean, it was just… weird? I don’t think we talked much or did anything together. We’re like summer and winter. That’s how different we are from each other :D. Now, we have to tolerate each other, and no matter how annoying she is to me, how how annoying I can be to her, we still love each other. As for my little brother, we’re buddies, man! I’m sure I wouldn’t be so close to him if I didn’t spend so much time with him.

Besides the sibling aspects, since homeschoolers have more time on their hands (while being able to excelling academically), they can do a lot more. Volunteer at the school, local hospital, library, the list is endless. Not to mention, the masjid is our haven. Most of a muslim home schoolers social life revolves around the masjid, a masjid which is active, has Quran classes, Sunday/Saturday schools, classes for young girls and for the aunties too :D, seminars, lectures, events, conferences, youth programs… You do get to meet all sorts of interesting people at the masjid.

As for the little kids, play mates are in abundance! I’m sure every community has a bunch of little kiddies who your child can meet up and play with. I don’t think there are ANY Muslim homeschooling groups out there, but if you EVER find one, be a part of it! Or make your own, you never know how much it can grow.

All in all, there are social benefits in home schooling, if done right. I know of kids who have parents that work all day and leave their kid tied to the house and tell them they MUST work all day. Home schooling can go terribly wrong without the right guidance and knowledge, just as anything else. So before you conduct your experiment, make sure you’ve researched well.

I used so many smilies šŸ˜€ haha…

5 Comments leave one →
  1. June 29, 2009 11:14 pm

    Great Job on this article!! Its totally awesome:P

  2. Hiba permalink
    July 8, 2009 2:42 pm

    Salamz, i think your article ROCKED! šŸ™‚ The “s” word shouldn’t even come up when people debate about the “disadvantages” of homescooling … considering how many opportunities you homeschoolers get to socialise in.

    Homeschooling allows Muslim families to use their local masajid the way the prophet (saw) and the sahabas used it.

    Mashallah… you’re doing a great job! … keep you’re posts coming!

  3. Aysha permalink
    October 31, 2009 5:27 pm

    Mashallah… this article is very nice!

  4. zain permalink
    December 6, 2009 12:23 pm

    And i think you are right…….but school teaches you how to deal with the real world, think that way…….and if your home training is good what you are going to do in schools, you will attract and communicate with the kids you think they are better than you and you will adopt the good of them and throw out the worse of you……… that so? and i saw kids correcting their attitudes and learning what their parents have not taught them…..and this is the way the non muslims observe the habits of muslim kids and they go near them.


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